On Pants...

"But you're already wearing pants!"
"Don't waste a good wear of pants!"
~Megan and Adie~

On parenthood...

Everyone's a virgin at one point in their life.
Not me, I came out having sex.
You're a tribble?

~Megan and Adie~

On clothing...

My feet don't wear pants.

~Megan~

On Elton John...

He's like a little teddy bear.
Who's British and Flaming.
That's the best kind.

~Claire, Katie and Emily~

On downfalls...

How can you memorize the entire history of Japan, but can't figure out how to play a simple box game?!?

~Adie

On Chivalry...

If the Wabash boys rape you, they do it right and proper. They take you out for a candle lit dinner first, maybe a drink. "Would you like a roofie with that"?

~Katie~

On Facebook...

"Are you crushing?!"
"Yes. He's rich, he's cute and he has OI!"
~Megan and Adie~

On Dance Majors...

"Oh look, there goes Justin. He's actually sparkling in the sunlight! There's where Stephanie Meyer gets her inspiration. Because pale white guys glitter in the sunlight."
"No, that's just the body glitter."
~Megan and Adie~

On sexual harassment...

I'll poke you with my banana!

~Matt S.

On cooking...

Pot Crock

~Megan~

On Winky Faces...

I like the wordy winky, it's suspicious and naughty...suspiciously naughty.

~Megan~

On identity...

Vulcans are Amish!!!

~Megan~

On spock...

Spock doesn't need roofies, he has the vulcan nerve pinch.

~Megan~

On rape...

I'm going to carress you now, but don't worry, I'm thinking about Spock.

~Katie~

On late night strolls...

"Well I don't know about that, but there was no room for Jesus in there."

~Claire

On dating stories...

Think about it, pickled squirrels makes a really good story of how the two of you met!

~R.J. and Stephanie

On professions...

The Crayon box says they are approved by teachers. That means I approve them.

~Katie~

On recitals...

What's with all these living composers? I want dead guy music.

~Dr. Schelle~

On Crayons...

I want to sharpen a crayon even though they are already sharp.

~Katie~

On presents...

My future students thank you. They're going to be like, "But Miss Arnt, we want to color." "NO!" "Today we are going to learn about hotness. Spock...Hot. Sam Becker....Not."

~Katie~

On Birthdays...

People would think you turned five instead of twenty.
Crayons means five.

~Adie and Katie~

On Children...

Los niños!
~Claire~